When an image speaks…

Ashley in Contentment

I was asked this question when a friend looked at the image above. “I wonder... is it the photograph that inspires you to say these thought provoking sayings.... or is what you are feeling at the time & the photograph matches your mood?”

I have taken a lot of images in my lifetime and viewed many more from the albums of others. I have always believed that if an image creates laughter, anger, loathing, sense of loss and any other emotion then it is a good image. As it has been said…

“A picture is worth a thousand words.”

There are moments when I will capture and image and I see many things in it. Like the one of Ashley above… I have a sense of contentment in my life… I have been through a long struggle as many of you know and with the realization of who I am as an individual has finally come to be. All through my work my imagery has been reflecting the inner me. Yes, I have done weddings, basic portraiture but the crux of my work… was from within my soul.

The images speak to me. 

A moment of reflection

At times I will run across an image of mine or the work of another that speaks to me and it does so to reflect that very moment of time. Occasionally I will stare at a scene before capturing it and find a peace, a feeling of wellness like in the chapel on Claudia’s farm. There were a few angles I have committed to my memory to take with me into oblivion as no camera could capture what I saw nor felt. When I read the bible in the chapel, I felt warmth, a near glow coming from the cross on the altar. I could see it but knew that this was just for me so I closed my eyes and prayed. While I am not a religious person… I am spiritual and I did feel something that day on the farm

Escape the darkness

Here is a dark side of what was… the inner me struggling to escape the shadows. This image tells me a story and with Savannah as the subject I can gaze upon it and see what was and what is. While I will never be as outwardly beautiful as Savannah I believe that I will radiate like she does with my own amazing aura. That comes from with-in. You see, when working with my subjects I will talk with them. Share stories of life, beliefs and wishes for the future. So, in some cases I will look at a photograph I have created and remember the entire conversation that lead up to the shutter being released. So when I look back and share an image with you I am reliving a moment of my life.

Cleansing oneself of the past

Often on location during the warmer months of the year brings a much different set of emotions and mind into play. It isn’t too often that I will become emotional while shooting but when I do, I share that emotion with whoever is there. I am not afraid of sharing tears and no one should be. Here, Tara’s image says many things… a look of loss, of wonder and of knowing. In the cleansing herself of the mud of her life, my life we have a fresh, clean perspective of what the universe had perhaps intended.

The images speak to me… 

Kindred spirit who has embraced my soul

Bree has brought many soulful moments and images to my work. She is a carpenter, photographer, naturalist, Mom and a super friend. We have shared imagery, gone to odd locations to create, talk, meditate and it is through the voice from the preserved images I can recall each moment and each connection we have made. I will carry on creating, listening and learning from one of the most vital women in my life other than my mom.

Imagery, photography, breathing and life are all an integral part of who I am. It is my life and my passion… a simple scene like in this image below will warm my soul and I simply must stop, stand within God’s light and splendor and give thanks for who I am and what I have become...

A road less travelled

The images speak to me 

The world is yours Grasshopper...

One way I deal with stresses and other such life ups and downs is to create… Either through imagery or by the written word. I closed down my old blog as that person doesn’t really exist any more. I mean everything that has happened to me as Phillip has made me the person that I am as a whole and that will not change very much if at all but I move on with true ideals of who I am, how I want to explore my imagery and how I wish to live my life as Sarah. My parents gave me names when I was born… I am keeping those names but dropping the one I really didn’t like but in the end I am the person who most matters to me and I am just fine with that   

Life experiences make you who you are… even as a carrot.

Today there is snow and freezing rain so I am not akin to going anywhere and in fact I feel quite depressed or down and I must turn to writing and other art forms including music.. As anyone knows who has followed me in my life and been there as part of it I was diagnosed with Gender Dysphoria and am adjusting my life to fit with where I feel I need to be. Of the people I have “come out” to there were some who just didn’t understand and with the way society is I don’t blame them for their lack of understanding. If they ask… I will try to answer as best that I can but one thing that everyone should know is that I am doing this for myself.

I have often said to people that in life you must take care of yourself first if you are going to be of any good to anyone else.  Health, contentment among other things and general well being should be a personal priority before you can do anything for others in your life. I accept myself for who I am and that was the first step to re-aligning my life to be where I would like to be. I am well aware that this is not going to be an easy road and I will be travelling along it by myself from time to time but it is a path I must take for my own physical and spiritual health and life. There will be ups and downs… hills to climb and stumbling blocks along the way but a journey I must make.

The demon that once was....

Today is one of those days where I feel at the bottom of a pile of manure somewhere… it is a feeling I have had before and I do have many things I can draw on to bring myself back up again spiritually. Over all I am fine and when I look at my life in general I do find moments where this kind of downfall could have been detrimental to my health if not my life. I do not find dishonour in ending it all as some have done but I have also not found a reason as some seem to think they have… I take each moment, find those things that mildly amuse me if even for a few minutes and draw on that positive energy to begin the climb back up.

It could be a bit weather related too, I know I have a full day with work tomorrow, then the salon after work and coffee with an amazing friend after that. Somewhere in there I will have a bite to eat and my laundry can wait another day. This afternoon has been filled with a few images, fighting Nazi soldiers, a nap and a senseless trip to the market. It pretty much reminded me I should have stayed home in the first place but I needed a spot of fresh air. I have a life to live and while I finally came to terms with how I wanted to do that not that long ago, I know I will enjoy it as best as I can.

Nothing wrong with a little fun...

I am an individual, a person who has found herself hiding in the closet of a man we all know. I was kept there as “he” had no idea what to do. One day the closet door was opened and all I heard were these words…

“You are free, the world can finally be yours…”