Moving on to the future...

I have watched the photographic industry die in Saskatoon. As a fellow artist pointed out the very essence of a collaboration has changed and now becomes a commercial advertisement of some sort. When to me (and to several others of us here in Saskatoon) the word collaboration means and still does: Where two or more people get together and plan and work out the details of a project (artistic etc) and come together to bring it to fruition. Hopefully succeeding but knowing that failure could also be part of it. If you fail, you sort out what went wrong and try again.

 

There are several so called “agencies” in Saskatoon. The 

model will pay a fee and hopefully get some kind of paying work out of the arrangement. Well... to me being an agent or signing with an agency means you have something they are looking for and you shouldn’t be paying a fee, the agent should be paying you a percentage of whatever income you help bring in. Anyway, this along with those people who simply cannot commit or live up to the arrangement made which includes not showing up or calling at the last minute because their grandma died again, has virtually killed this city for any creative collaborations.

The future of photo modelling has gone off on a tangent and if it weren’t for a select few then I would simply move on. With “flakes” on all sides as well as unlawfully operated agencies, studios and such that do not have a license (city and provincial) and don’t pay taxes (provincial and federal) I don’t need the drama nor bullsh-t and am beginning not to tolerate it. Will I report the lawbreakers?

Maybe...

I have been asked why I travel to the west coast as often as I do. Well the answer is simple. The artists in Vancouver and on Vancouver Island are a dedicated group and will work together with me and other photographers, artists etc to bring a simple idea to life. A true meaning of collaboration is alive and well. Everyone will listen to what others have to offer and their noses are not stuck up into the air like there are at home. Along the way there is some really fantastic scenery and that helps in the journey.

I may seem to be a bit bitter but I am not really as I have better things to do. Working with a small cluster of real people, my work and research my work will continue. So will my reading, music (playing and composing) sketching and more. My studio will continue to operate working on collaborative and personal projects as well as Photographic Therapies and so on. I will free up even more time by eliminating most social media (Facebook and the studio Facebook pages) but Instagram will be maintained.

I am done with many things but those who are real and dedicated will walk with me and a handful of others from coast to coast proudly into the future. 

This blog will serve as the medium I choose to share my work and imagery.

Is there a start or end?

When writing a blog... where does one start or end? How often should a person draft a post? No one can answer those questions other than the writer. There was a time when I made nearly daily entries... over 1000 in 3 years but that sad existence is gone now and a new life is well underway. I have tried to go back to sort out when I figured things out and when I began to let people know what was on the horizon.
 

One life gone in favour of a new and authentic one.

 So with that in mind I put together a chronological list of events but I won’t bore you with that. Needless to say I quietly celebrated my 6^th birthday this past October. Many things have happened since I first sorted out a rather chaotic thought process and most recently with conversation and messages with my massage therapist, I have sorted out even more of my life’s mysteries. Without friends like her, my esthetician, and the loving support from Laura I have moved further and quicker into my life. I can include a number of “soul” friends from the Pacific Rim all the way to a wee island in the Atlantic in those benefactors and treasure their existence deep within my heart.

 

I bared my soul and body to the world.

There have been changes in my body which I love and a few I don’t but I still embrace my entire being as I have learned to love myself and all that I am. Yes I curse random hair growth but who doesn’t so I do what I feel I need to in order to make it right... by my standards not by anyone else’s. I don’t care what others think and never will... it isn’t any of my business anyway. I dress for comfort and sometimes can be a little bit of a show-off but everyone is entitled. No one can tell me how to dress but I am open to suggestions. I do not fear openly shopping for clothes or asking for advice and I rather enjoy it.

 

Meditation or prayer for lost souls...

 There are several things on my mind as Remembrance Day is approaching but that is to be expected and I sometimes become very quiet and withdrawn. I plan my own schedule and sometimes that involves ripping out a few hairs (figuratively speaking) but when sorting out studio times, personal times and mix in with that social and studio travel and can be mind boggling. I still, much to the chagrin of some just wander off unannounced and without a solid plan but that has been my way for a few decades now. There are times I will be traveling with Laura and Sam, and other times not. If I am on a studio trip, my mind is solely on the purpose of the journey. But... when I want to go exploring then I will drag anyone along that wants to go.

 My vision is at a stage where my travel (by car) for any reason is limited and I find that extremely frustrating and even a little depressing. I work my way through those stages of depression one moment at a time. Knowing I will once again find the waters of the Pacific and have already planned another journey to a small group of islands in the Atlantic. There were times I would drive for 16 -18 hours in a single day just to reach a destination sooner... thereby having more time where I want, where I need to be. But more on that later...

Be well, be kind to each other and be blessed...

It was a painful day...

It was a painful day but then getting work done on a back tattoo can be that way. As the needles penetrated my skin I was able to drift my thoughts to other things. It helps with the pain when you can do that. Anyway... while the time was short I did get some peace from a conversation I was part of last night. The time we have is not enough. Eyes look into mine and my heart pounds, can’t explain it but something feels right.

Her eyes looked into mine

I am openly concerned about a number of my friends and like with my family, it would hurt so much to see something bad happen. Two of them are having issues with each other as people will do and I remain neutral, but there for either of them. This is life...

I live alone, with my cat and I like it that way... We do argue and I usually get injured as a result but that is our relationship. Most of the time it is a peaceful and loving one and other times he just disappears all together. Yes, it is possible for two humans to be involved and not even live together. Each doing their own thing, but each joining with the other for time together. Travel, movies, walks, cooking in the kitchen to entertain friends or just watching the waves roll into shore.

Anyway... I will move on day by day and enjoy what I can on my own. I do travel a lot by myself as that is all I have. It is great to do that too. Adventure, talking with random people, just doing your own thing wherever you may be. I have also travelled with someone and that is wonderful, especially if you are showing them things they have never seen. This is a major adventure and I am always open to this sort of thing.

A wonderful travel partner

Soon I leave for the Pacific Rim and I am not travelling alone. Char and I have travelled together before and it was a total adventure as we both found ourselves in places that neither of has ever been. Now that is something that is amazing especially when you can share it with a friend.